The beginning of the end...

Sat 27th & Sun 28th June - The "Great" Glen Way Part I & II

I'm blending these days into one as that's exactly what they've been; a blur that I'd rather not linger on for too long.

The fun began when it took over an hour and a half simply to get out of Fort William. Even cutting corners did very little to help as the Great Glen Way (GGW) takes you all around the houses without seeing a single attraction or landmark. However, once I was out of town the feeling was great and I was steaming along the towpaths in glorious sunshine.

Soon enough the smile was wiped off my face as the GGW has an ugly trait of teasing you with short simple sections, before forcing you to backtrack a few miles. If the route of the backtracking was exciting, I'd have been all for it, however when you walk 2 miles up a hill to get a half-arsed glimpse of a rock that for years has been blocked by overgrown bushes... the excitement is pretty diluted.

The only real highlight of day one was the lovely sponsorship by the campsite owner who not only let me stay for free, but gave me £10 to boot! Shame the only positive thing of day one had nothing to do with the walk though.

Day two began equally as frustrating as I was swamped by midges upon opening my tent. I walked and walked and walked, until I reached Loch Ness but even the beautiful weather couldn't lure Nessie out of her watery home. By early afternoon I reached Mark Moxon's destination for the day, but pushed on to what I thought would be a simple yomp down the hill... WRONG WRONG WRONG!

After about 4 more hours, I realised I hadn't eaten a single thing since 12pm and my stomach was reminding me by growling louder than the music on my iPod. Taking a second by the roadside, I reached into my bag and pulled out one of my remaining ration packs. I'd been saving these for emergencies, but this seemed a good a time as any so down went the lamb and dumplings.

With a bit of fuel in my feet, I marched onwards and soon came to the road which would lead me to the campsite for the night. I had very little drive left by this stage as I'd been walking for nearly 14 hours, so when I reached the ridge over the campsite, I pretty much rolled and bounced down the hillside until I came to a slump at the bottom.

After about 10 minutes of laying in the grass, I finally stumbled to my feet and got my tent up and my gear squared away. Stupidly I sat on my pillow and was met by a loud bang, however at this late stage I couldn't care less so my waterproofs and clothes bag took the role of bedding for the night.


Mon 29th June - Great Glen Way Part III... Return of The Glen...

Well after walking 32 miles yesterday, I was in no rush to be darting off early. As I emerged from my tent and began stretching everything back into place, a voice sparked up behind me.

"Aaah, finally caught up with me then I see!", said Patrick. He was the other end-to-end walker that I'd met on the West Highland Way and it was great to see a familiar face.

It was also refreshing to hear someone else moan about how boring the Great Glen Way was too! It was clear that we were happy to be finishing it today, even if there's still 18 miles remaining. Patrick then headed off to the café, so I packed up and headed into town to get some gifts for my little brothers and nieces.
Once I'd posted them all, I waved Patrick farewell and got a head start as I knew the walking machine that he was would catch me up in no time at all.

The route itself began fairly simple, but was soon back to winding through forest, making no progress towards Inverness. It's so painful on both the legs and the morale when you know that not taking the road option would be twice as slow - the price I pay for not wanting to get run over I suppose.

After an hour or two, the route opened up and I saw two familiar faces taking a break on the side of the path. These two Scottish guys had also been doing the GGW and we'd had a chat on a couple of occasions along the way. I could see Patrick hot on my heels, so I bid them farewell for now and steamed on up the track. By this stage I as at DEFCON 5 of boredom so I took 5mins to explore a forest picnic area. As I sat there I saw all 3 of my fellow walkers pass by, so I guessed I should do the same. However a sign for a café next to the way caught my eye and up the path I ambled.

I could only laugh as who should I see sitting around a small table? Patrick and the two guys who'd just passed me. It seemed like all of us were taking any chance we could away from the way today. We easily let 40mins slip away as we chatted over some coffee in the world's weirdest café. It was a campsite that sat in the middle of some nasty marshland, with a sign labelled "Gents" that clearly pointed to a pile of crap sitting on a load of hay. The woman who ran the place was lovely, if not a little nuts - but her crazy antics passed the time before we all realised there was walking to be done.

Refuelled and ready to go, I teamed up with Patrick and to my surprise, managed to keep up with him. He explained all the events he'd done, including desert marathons which really put today's heat into perspective.
Deep in chat, we seemed to reach Inverness in no time, before I shook his hand farewell for what seemed like the 100th time and headed off to find a B&B for the night. John O'Groats, you're in my sights...


Tues 30th June - Inverness to Evanton...

Well today began with a smile as I knew that I'd no longer be on the Great Glen Way. Over an odd breakfast of Weetabix, yogurt and a slice of toast (yum), the Chinese owner of the B&B got into an even odder heated tirade. Out of nowhere, she exploded into a rant about how Indian and Pakistani immigrants who hate the western world but still live in the UK should sod off home. I had no idea what to even say to the maniac as she was blabbing for a good 30mins whilst I was trying to eat my "breakfast".

I could only laugh as when she offered me fresh coffee, a sachet of Kenco was placed on my table with some luke warm water. I assumed she thought fresh coffee meant that it was made with a newly bought sachet, but was more glad that by now she'd finally finished her monologue. Quickly making a break for it, I thanked her for what little there was of the food and headed off to pack my stuff.

After leaving what could barely be called a B, let alone a B&B... I joined the A9 which would take me all the way along the Scottish east coast to Wick until the A99 takes it place. Even though I was road walking, I was so happy to be making good progress towards my destination rather than winding up a hillside (I'm clearly still bitter as you can see). The pavement running out didn't even seem to bother me as I pounded away at the miles.

After a while, I gave the Dingwall police station a call (thanks Dad for the phone number) to check if the Cromarty Bridge had a footpath. Once I knew it did, I was off like a rocket and crossed it by 2pm, cutting out a big corner of the coast and putting an even bigger grin on my face.

A sandwich later, I made the final push to the campsite at Evanton and set up the tent for the extortionate price of £9. I wanted to take the owner's pulse to check if she had a heart, but I guessed I already knew that I'd find nothing.

To celebrate the fact I was on the beginning of the home straight, I headed to the shop and picked up a couple of Millers, a BBQ and some fish... quick the evening ahead I think you'll agree.
An hour later a familiar voice popped over the top of my tent...

"Who's smelly old boots are those then?" said Patrick. I should have had a wise crack ready and waiting, but was too busy stuffing my face with BBQ goodies to reply.

I just can't seem to shake this guy off my tail !!!


Wed 1st July - Evanton to Dornoch...

After a midge free solid night's sleep, the lack of breakfast didn't even cross my mind as I made the FINAL farewell to Patrick.

By the time I was passing Alness, my stomach had other ideas and was beginning to make some insane noises that couldn't go unnoticed. Giving into its demands, I headed into town and wolfed down a bacon and egg buttie. I also managed to pick up some new headphones for £1 - albeit each song sounded as if it was being played underwater, but still... quite the David Dickinson!

I made the decision to take the slower, windy roads up towards today's destination as I really wasn't feeling the A9 with its insane drivers. This decision paid dividends as there was next to no traffic to speak of, allowing me to enjoy some great views of the surrounding countryside.

By early afternoon, I was nearing Dornoch when a guy pulled up ahead and stood there by his car, waiting for me to catch up. "Dya wanna lift?", he asked kindly. I explained what I was doing and he told me that he'd spent 13 years with the Highlanders before the gov' mashed all the regiments into one. It was a shame to lose all the history, but I guess that's what happens when the people upstairs need to save some cash these days.

I thought Pete was kind enough to hand over a bottle of Red Bull to keep me fuelled, but I was knocked for six when he reached into his glove compartment and whipped out £50 in sponsorship! That certainly covers the lack of donations in Scotland and some!

The kindness didn't stop there as an ex RAF engineer told me to stop a few houses up and was waiting with an ice cold Magners by the time I arrived. His house was opposite an RAF bombing range which was totally surreal to watch as the Tornadoes ran wave after wave of bombing exercises, ready to deploy for real in Afghanistan.

Once I arrived in Dornoch, I headed to the local SPAR and was even met by a donation of £10 there too. True enough, my luck had to run out soon enough, as upon arriving at the campsite I could see there was nothing there to speak of. The grass was knee high as I waded into the middle of the field, only to be met by a call of "Oi, over 'eer".

The feral owner wasn't much help, but pointed me to a field in which I might be able to pitch a tent. I ambled over and picked the best of a bad lot, but I suppose it was free after all. I should be happy, and I would have been if it A: didn't sound like a war zone outside... and B: I didn't have every species of insect in my tent with me!


Thurs 2nd July - Dornoch to Brora...

Well today began with a record breaking beginning, seeming as I wanted to get out of the jungle-esk piece of land that I called home for the night.

By 7am I was a few miles outside of town and came across a hotel that looked like a safe bet for brekkie. Luckily the owner said she would let me have cereal, toast, fresh coffee and porridge for only a fiver - so I snapped up her offer. It all went down a treat and by 8am I was back on the road, enjoying the delicious energy inside my belly... yum!

Yet again I was on the A9, but for some reason today it didn't bother me one bit. I could only chuckle at the fact that my limited edition £1 headphones had only lasted one night... of which the "limited" must have related to the time they'd last.

By 11am, I'd made it to Golspie and headed into the nearest shop for some supplies. As I emerged from the door, I was met by an older couple standing over my bag with smiles ready and waiting. They were lovely enough to not only sponsor me a few pounds, but hand me a fiver and tell me that they were treating me to lunch. They told about a lovely little café nearby, so taking their advice, I headed straight there and plonked myself down to a £5 feast.

The midday sun was now in full effect, so on went the bush hat and in went the fluids.

Between Golspie and Brora, the walk was pretty dull until the trees cleared and out jumped the North Sea with its blissfully cooling breeze. However, this breeze turned out to be the wind before the storm.

I had just set up my tent and was returning from the shower when I heard the first of about 3 thunder storms all rolling in side-by-side. No more than 5mins after I squared away everything inside the tent, the rain began and didn't look like stopping any time soon. Still, I guess that means a cooler night for me, which I won't be complaining about.

p.s. I've just managed to set fire to my tent... maybe this citronella candle was a bad idea after all... whoops!


Fri 3rd July - Brora to Helmsdale...

Well you'd think that I'd have learnt my lesson by now, but clearly you'd be wrong... very very wrong indeed. This morning I woke up with a killer headache after the couple in the caravan next to me invited me over for a few glasses of red once the storms had cleared. They were a hilarious pair from Warrington (I passed through there and was flashed by the B&B owner... remember?), but were now living in a caravan after regrettably moving to Helmsdale.

According to them, upon moving to Helmsdale they experienced massive racism from the local Scottish residents and were tarnished with the label "FEBs" (f****** English Bastards). Thank god I'm only staying there one night, I thought!

Back to this morning, I was soon on the road trying to ignore the urges to give in to my headache. After a while I heard the all too familiar sound of trekking poles clicking on the tarmac behind me. For a second I had a feeling it was Patrick come back to stalk me, but as I turned around I could see it was a younger guy closing fast.

I slowed down until he was close and asked, "End to End?". A smile and a nod came as the reply before we exchanged the usual facts and figures of each other's journeys. Brendan had started around the time of Easter and was luckily enough to have his girlfriend joining for the last week of his journey, which no doubt would have put the icing on the bun. Alas being a singleton, I don't have that luxury... my tent's too small anyway :P

We powered on through the miles and reached Helmsdale in next to no time at all, before exchanging numbers. This was the destination for me, but Brendan said farewell and headed off to his girlfriend Jenna and their car a few miles down the line.

As for the town, it was a bit of a dump but that was the least of my concerns. I finally found a B&B for £17 and settled down to the Andy Murray match.


Sat 4th July - Helmsdale to Dunbeath...

After a hearty breakfast that contained enough cholesterol to fell an ox, I was back on the road in glorious sunshine. There's sod all that can be said about the route as this last stretch is a dull yomp along the A9 and A99 to John O'Groats.

Even though the route was dull, the weather conditions weren't. Within the space of two hours I'd gone from blazing sunshine accompanied by light winds, to sea mist so thick that no single driver had a clue as to what was 5m in front of their noses. Because of this, I strapped my Maglite to my arm and stayed as far away from these idiots as humanly possible.

In a brief lull from the mist, I was met by a series of tuneful honks as a Ford Ka pulled in and out jumped Jenna, Brendan's girlfriend. Brendan had walked on further yesterday so she was returning from dropping him off a few miles up the road. Kindly, she invited me to join them for a whiskey or two at John O'Groats as Brendan was planning to finish on Monday as well. With a big smile on my face, I accepted their offer and hit the road.

A few hours later, I arrived at Dunbeath - yet another painfully isolated village with only a SPAR and a campsite to its name. Luckily for me, that's all I needed so I stocked up and set up the tent for the night just in time for the sun to burn away the sea mist.


Sun 5th July - Dunbeath to Wick...

I can safely say that the thought of finishing tomorrow made this day a complete and utter blur. I can't even think of one thing that stuck out and became news worthy the whole day!!

The night before however, was a different kettle of fish.

I crashed out about 9.30pm and was looking forward to a solid nights sleep, ready for the 21 miles I'd have to walk to Wick tomorrow. After an hour and a half, this plan went right out the window as I was woken up by two dutch sounding morons who thought it would be a great idea to set up their tent within about 20cm of mine.

They were so loud that there was no chance I was going to get to sleep, so as a last resort I popped my head out of the tent and made it clear I wanted them to shut the hell up. It didn't help one bit as this caused them to talk even louder in whatever language it was they were speaking, clearly making every effort to wind me up no end.

It was the coup de grâce when one of the idiots managed to walk straight through my tent! It wasn't even remotely dark which made it obvious that it was no accident. With an almighty roar I let out a torrent of language that could have toppled a building in one fell swoop. It seemed to work to some level as soon after, they got in their tent and went to sleep... snoring just as loud as they had been nattering.

By now it was about 1:30am and I was in dire need of some solid sleep. Two German bikers returning from the local pub however, had other ideas. They were right at the other end of the campsite, yet with the wind blowing towards me, their drunken voices carried as if they were being spoken through megaphones. This went on for hour and hour until by 5am I'd had enough and decided to cut my losses and leave.

Like a spiteful child, I decided now would be a fantastic time to play the always fun game of... "How loud can you pack away your tent"... so come on down Ed - it's your turn to spin the wheel of fun!

It's amazing how much noise a single zip can make, as well as finding ANYTHING metal to throw on top of each other in order to make loud clanging noises as close to the tent next to me as possible. In all honestly I could have easily packed up within the hour, but it was more fun to stretch the process out to two slow and torturous hours especially for the morons in the tent next door.

By 7am, they emerged from their tents with faces like thunder and were met by a huge morning grin from me... reap what you sow you noisy europeans! I was then back on the road and it was equally as foggy as yesterday, but within a few hours the sun had cleared a path for me and on I plodded towards Wick.

By around 4pm, I'd arrived in the grey "city" of Wick and tracked down a cheap and cheerful B&B right next to the station that would be taking me home on Tuesday morning. Like a sly fox, I booked in for two nights which would allow me to leave the heavy stuff at the B&B and walk to John O'Groats with a light bag... a feeling that I hadn't enjoyed once since leaving Brighton back in late April.

With this thought in my mind, I vegged out in front of the tele with some nibbles and drifted off to sleep.


Mon 6th July - Wick to John O'Groats...

WOOO HOOO my last day has finally arrived, but before the celebrations began I needed to wait around for the train station to open. It had the stupid hours of 10:10am - 5:14pm ... no doubt because someone needed to catch their bus. I was supposed to be meeting Brendan, his Mum and Jenna around late afternoon and seeming as I had to wait until 10:20am til I was finally off, I doubted they'd still be there by the time I arrived.

What I hadn't accounted for was how fast I was able to walk with this light pack! It felt like I was pretty much jogging down the road, a feeling that was completely and utterly alien to me. I'd also managed to pick up some headphones that would last more than 24 hours, so on went the iPod and out came the singing.

I'd left Wick miles behind and was belting out some songs at the top of my voice to the amusement of the cyclists that were passing me on their way to John O'Groats... however I was certainly not stopping, IT'S MY LAST DAAAAY!

Two motorbikes soon bolted past me, both giving me a thumbs up before roaring on down the road towards my destination. Within a few hours I'd made record time to the outskirts of John O'Groats and could see the outline of where I needed to head towards.

As I arrived at the entrance to the end of my walk, I saw the two bikers who'd given me the thumbs up a few miles back and a call of "congratulations! well done you!" came from their group. They'd got talking to a woman who was waiting for her partner to finish it himself as he'd been cycling the route. In her hands she had a bottle of champagne and a couple of glasses, ready to crack open when he arrived.

"Well, seeming as you've walked it... it seems only fitting that you get a glass", she said as she opened it even before her partner had got there. I couldn't help but laugh as I wondered what he'd think, but it was champagne after all so gracefully accepted a glass.

He soon came coasting down the home straight towards us and looked totally bamused as to why the booze was already flowing before he got there, but could only laugh when he realised I'd walked it and added "bastard, you're showing me up here!"

I then made sure the challenge was offically over by signing the End-To-Enders book and getting my time sheet stamped. Once this was done, I got my offical photograph done by the sign to an audience of on lookers, all of which looked confused as to why anyone would be mad enough to walk it.

After a few more hours, Brendan, Jenna and Brendan's Mum Michelle pulled up in the car and we all squeezed in before heading to the nearest hotel to celebrate with a few Whiskeys. It was great to share the highs and lows of the challenge with someone who'd done it too, especially now it was over.

Soon enough, it was time for them to head off to dinner and time for me to make my way back to Wick and the comfort of my B&B for the final night in Scotland.

It's an odd feeling to finally be finished. I was sat on the end of the bed, just thinking about each and every day that's gone past and how mad I really was to have walked all this way. Even now as I write this, a couple of days after finishing, it doesn't feel real... like I'm simply taking a rest day and I'll be back to walking tomorrow.

I guess the end was a bit of an anti-climax seeming as in your mind you have this fantasy about fireworks and dancing girls waiting for you at the end. I was certainly expecting to be a bit more emotional once I'd finished it - but that's not really me - I was just happy to be done.


The End... sort of...
I'm not even going to write an official end to this blog as it feels like this has started something for me that I don't want to come to an end. However, what I will do is thank everyone who made this possible - be it via their sponsorship, taking me in for the night when I had nowhere to go, or simply passing them in the street and receiving a thumbs up... I couldn't have done it without you.

A special thanks needs to go out to my Dad David, for his continued support along the way. This isn't just through him taking time out to drop me my next set of maps in Bath and Lancaster, but also the well timed phone calls when I felt like sacrificing myself to Nessie on the Great Glen Way!

A massive thank you also goes out to the rest of my family, who from the moment I left Brighton I missed no end.

The final thanks goes to Ian and Lynn for firstly saving my life with a well timed BBQ near Newchurch Common, but more importantly becoming people I'm proud to call friends for life.



... Right I've got itchy feet from sitting down writing this blog for so long, so you should all get back to work!

Thank you all for reading, I hope you've enjoyed following my moans and rants all the way from Lands End to John O'Groats.
Ed :)

Mon 15th to Fri 26th June - Hawick to Fort William...

Wow! I didn't realise how long it had been since I last got a chance
to update this blog!!

Mon 15th June - Hawick to Galashiels...

after a quick brekkie I packed up all my gear and headed down to
settle up the bill. I was expecting my wallet to take a beating as
I'd stayed in a b&b for 2 nights, however I could have hugged Lorraine
when she said she only wanted £20! with a smile on my face, I rejoined
the A7 and made tracks towards Galashiels.

unfortunately it wasn't long before the footpaths ran out, meaning I
was high up on the wet & muddy grass verges. I just had to remind
myself that soon i'd be back on a canal route, avoiding these maniac
drivers.

once I reached galashiels, the heavens opened and I sheltered under
the nearest tree whilst I checked my maps for a campsite. there was
one about 4 miles to the north west, but I honestly could not be
bothered setting up in this rain.

just down the road I found a cheap b&b with a real difference. the
owner let me stay in a massive room before showing me an even bigger
table of DVDs! next was the communal kitchen that was full to the brim
with sweets, cookies and all manner of goodies that I could help
myself to... so I did.

I settled in and wandered into town to have a gander. to my surprise
I found a cinema, so treated myself to a showing of 'angels and
deamons'. whether it was the day catching up on me or the film itself
I wasn't sure, but I was half asleep by the time the adverts ended!

still... made a nice change of scenery from staying in.

Tues 16th June - Galashiels to Heriot...

today was a real test of steel as I was venturing into terrain without
anything that resembled a map.

even if I didn't know where I was going, I certainly had enough energy
to get me there as the host served up a full Scottish breakfast of 4
jumbo sausages, 4 pigs, 2 chickens and some cereal... maybe a slight
bending of the truth, but not far off!

as per usual, the footpaths ran out and I was enjoying a few near
death experiences with the torrent of moronic drivers. the most insane
happened when a woman came hurtling around the bend about 100m in
front, before launching the car into the trees that lined the road.
the car then reappeared onto the road and continued to roll onto it's
roof, coming to a halt as flat as a pancake.

by the time I got there, the driver was safely out of what used to be
her car and was sat shaking like a leaf on the grass verge. she was
fine, but the car was a total write-off.

I considered offering up my medical kit for the woman's grazes, but
seeming as the emergency services were already on the way I didn't
fancy getting sued by some idiot.

seeming as she was uninjured, I can guilt free say it was quite
exciting and helped stop the onset of tiredness... but I doubt the
driver would have thought the same.

I set off again, but a mental driver had other ideas as he decided to
drive around the crash site at full speed and right towards me! in a
hurry, I jumped over the crash barrier (as best I could with my
Bergen) but managed to smash my left knee into a sharp corner of
metal. a few minutes of rolling around on the floor in pain passed
with no one even stopping to give two hoots - so off I hobbled.

within minutes I had a swollen knee and could barely walk on it. I
saw the sign for Heriot and seeming as it signposted in such a major
way, I hoped there would be somewhere for me to stay.

upon arriving I could have cried as it was nothing more than a hamlet
with, get this... a fancy dress shop?! I stood in the rain, looking
360 degrees for any sign of life. a woman walking her dog soon
appeared, so I hobbled over and asked her if she knew of anyone who
had a field in which I could pitch a tent.

she ummed and arrd for a second before saying i could set up my tent
in her family's back garden! RESULT!!!
it turned out that she was kind enough to not only let me stay with
them for dinner, but also crash out in their spare bedroom.

I actually couldn't believe my luck at finding such a superstar family
that would take in a stranger at the drop of a hat... or in my case,
the bash of a knee.

Clare was a very spiritual person and her kindness was put into
perspective as she explained how amazing it felt when people helped
her out during her backpacking days. strangers had helped her out and
now she was returning the favour. what's more, she phoned her friend
Marriane who lives in Edinburgh and secured me a bed for tomorrow night!

someone up there likes me...

Wed 17th June - Heriot to Edinburgh...

after a great Scottish breakfast of porridge and heavy painkillers, I
was back on the roads and making good progress. luckily for me,
within 6 miles the A7 became more urban - meaning FOOTPATHS!!!!

within no time I could just make out the outline of Edinburgh castle
through the persistant drizzle. Clare's partner Julyan had printed
out a map of how to get to their friend's house, so following it
closely, I entered the outskirts of the city.

I decided to take the high road (no Scottish songs please) over the
golf course and it paid off. I snapped some great panoramic pics of
the city before giving Alistair & Marriane a call to let them know I
was close.

their son Simon was also there as they gave me a warm welcome before
sitting down to have a good long chat. to my delight, marriane said I
could stay an extra day and use it to have a look around Edinburgh.
needless to say, I didn't need asking twice.

Thurs 18th June - Rest day in Edinburgh...

today did exactly what it says on the tin! after a quick brekkie with
Marriane and Simon, I got a few bits together and left for the centre
of the city.

luckily for me, they lived seconds from the canal so even though it
took 40mins, the walk in was great.

the rest of the day was spent being a total tourist, snapping pictures
of Edinburgh castle from Prince's Gardens before taking a stroll down
the royal mile.

by late afternoon I bought a bottle of wine for Marriane, Alistair &
Simon and ambles back to basecamp for tea.

Fri 19th June - Edinburgh to Linlithgow...

the solid nights sleep was exactly what I needed as I began packing my
gear back into its usual home. it's funny how normally I would throw
my stuff into a bag without any thought, however during this trek,
everything has a place in my Bergen.

the tedious task of packing was broken up by Alistair cooking bacon
and sausages which went down a treat - so I suggested they open a
B&B... I think one walker was enough for them, let alone a constant
stream.

it was soon time to make tracks, so I gave Marriane & Alistair a fond
farewell and followed their directions back onto the union canal.

the non-existance of mad drivers was fantastic as it meant I could
plod away safe and sound - but for a few cyclists.

I was soon leaving the city and making my way into the countryside,
but not before turning one last time to get an eyefull of Edinburgh in
all its glory.

the weather had been forecast to chop'n'change all day and it did just
that. the wind threw me from one side to another as the sun tried its
best to burn through the clouds. by early afternoon the rain clouds
won and I sheltered under one of the canal's bridges which I donned
the waterproofs.

the moment they were on, the Scottish weather gods thought it would be
funny to let the scortching sun out. however I wasn't playing into
their trap and left the kit on... warm is better than soaked.

in good time I arrived at Linlithgow and took a walk around the loch
that hosted fantastic views of the town's restored palace. luckily
the campsite was pretty close to town, so I set up and grabbed some
dinner before returning to my maps for tomorrow.

Sat 20th June - Linlithgow to Kilsyth...

well the day began very smoothly as I realised the permathrin spray
that I used on my tent allowed me to sleep like a log - bite free!

now all I needed to do was walk 24 miles through indecisive weather...

the smooth start soon came to an end as it took me nearly an hour
simply to get out of the bloody town. this didn't help my spirits as
by the time I got back on the canal, I felt totally deflated. to save
time messing about with checking which bridge I'd reached, I picked an
obvious landmark and got into my stride.

the landmark happened to be a pitch black 250m tunnel that made me
feel like I was cave diving rather than hiking. there were streams of
water running down the walls, giving a really spooky atmosphere,
especially once I'd reached half way.

I was soon back on the sun lit towpaths and bored out of my mind (moan
moan moan). for some reason my trusty 1,000 mile socks had decided to
give me the mother of all blisters on top of my foot. there was
little I could do apart from head to my next destination of "The
Falkirk Wheel".

it was an amazing piece of engineering that allowed boats to go up or
down a 100m drop on what can only be described as a giant ferris wheel.

the remainder of today's walk was dull as dishwater until I got about
7 miles from Kilsyth. I stopped at a canal side restaurant and took a
look at the b&bs that dad had text me last night.
sods law, they were all booked so I spent the next hour hunting down
somewhere to stay that wasn't gonna break the bank.

I finally found a cheap hotel and with my fuelled, yet blistered feet,
pushed on towards Kilsyth. the town itself was a bit of a dump, but I
was getting closer to the West Highland Way where the scenery will
make walking a lot less dull... hopefully!!!

Sun 21st June - Kilsyth to Milarrochy...

with the west highland way (WHW) on my mind, I downed a full Scottish
brekkie that would have killed anyone not walking it off. people have
been telling me how beautiful my route will be, but these idiots love
the pennine way, so I'll see for myself.

after leaving Kilsyth I was stuck on the A-roads that head west until
they link up with a disused railway, now converted into a long
distance cycle path. it started at a station platform that looks more
like something from a horror film. grass and weeds have replaced
passengers and tracks, but soon enough the tarmac and gravel took over.

I was loving this route as it combined great scenery with a solid,
walkable path... plus no cars!

within a few hours, a cyclist slowed down and rode beside me for a
mile or so to have a chat. he was a big fan of the west highland way,
so I knew that if someone could do it on a bike, then I stood a chance.

after he rode off into the distance, I followed the track for its
duration and was sad to leave its sanctuary. luckily for me the WHW
began soon so I took the chance to grab a light lunch from a local pub.

once I'd wolfed down some cheesy nachos (light lunch in weight only),
I opened the gate that signified the start of what would take me all
the way to fort willy!

I let a couple of walkers pass me as they were travelling light, with
one daysack between them... yes I'm bitter. initially they bolted
off, but I saw this as a nice little pace setter so kept with them as
best I could. this meant having to even jog a few sections that with
the weight of my pack, was a tall order.

even though I was pretty shattered, I was loving every second of this
route, especially with my pace car ahead.

after a few hours, the pair unfortunately went their own way and I
headed for the village of Balmaha that sits right on the shore of loch
lomond.

I followed the coast over some great rocky paths until I found a
campsite that seemed a safe bet. unfortunately they weren't feeling
too charitable as for the first time in a while I had to pay for
stating at a campsite... humph!

even more west highland way tomorrow so my "bed" beckons.

Mon 22nd June - Milarrochy to Inverarnan...

all I can say is WOW! if all of this trek had been like today, I may
be dead by now, but I'd be a very very happy man indeed!

I left the campsite soon after the group of 4 walkers that I'd met the
previous night. within no time we were playing cat n mouse as we
leapfrogged positions when I and they rested. the route itself was
seriously demanding; with long rocky uphill sections that burnt the
thighs, followed my steep descents that pounded the knees.

soon enough I found my stride and pushed on infront of the four
walkers and was loving both the terrain and scenery to boot.

sadly there was no chance of picking up supplies from the campsite
before leaving, so I knew although I had 2 liters of water, I only had
2 cereal bars and a banana for the rest of the day. I necked some fun
sized cereals, but it wasn't the most substantial brekkie.

I soon passed a couple of walkers, each following the same path as
me. we joked about the fact that on our maps, the path we were on was
supposed to be easy. by the look on both our faces, the opposite was
true.

pushing on ahead, I was feeling the obvious drawback of missing a
hearty breakfast. taking a few minutes to swallow a banana and a
cereal bar, I enjoyed snapping away a few chance pictures of loch
lomond.

I could only laugh as I sat on a picnic bench looking out over the
stunning loch. like a sledge hammer to the ears, a car full of chavs
pulled up and proceeded to blast the worst trance music at full
volume. everyone looked at each other with total disbelief as to what
was happening. soon enough the park warden walked over to tell them
to shut up, but by the look on his face he was bemused as to why they
came to loch lomond to do that.

back on the road I soon met up with the couple I'd passed earlier on.
all three of us powered on along the route as they had a ferry to
catch and I just needed to keep walking. the miles melted away as we
tackled some tricky sections of the walk before arriving at the ferry
port. until now I hadn't had to keep a conversation going whilst
hiking and Christ was it twice as hard on the lungs. they kindly
bought me a couple of cans of coke until they had to make tracks
across the loch and back to their car.

once I was back on my own, I was chomping away at the miles and loving
every second of it. if it weren't for my walking sticks, I'd not be
laying in my tent writing this - as they saved me from a few spills to
say the least.

near what was supposed to be Rob Roy's cave, I felt like I was
mountain climbing rather than hiking. there were sections of the
route which had clearly fallen into the loch but had been made into a
more challenging section.

soon enough the hardcore path filtered out into wider fields with only
a few demanding sections, yet they didn't half drag on!

I finally arrived at Inverarnan after about 9 hours of walking and
dodged hundreds of midges as I set up my tent. the even more annoying
thing was that with the sheer number of charity walkers who pass
through here, the owners don't give charity discounts otherwise they'd
never earn a penny I guess.

to cheer myself up I headed to the pub and had a top notch curry and
an even better chat with an RAF mountain leader before retiring to my
tent.

Tues 23rd June - Inverarnan to Tyndrum...

today should have been a relatively simple 12 mile walk, however as
you'll see it really wasn't.

last night I was woken up by a group of noisy Indian idiots who
thought it would be fun to stand around a fire right by my tent. I
poked my head out and glared at them before trying to get back to
sleep. annoyingly, opening my tent let in a load of midges... so now
I was fuming and what happened next tipped me over the edge.

just as I was nodding off again, one of the morons managed to walk
right into my tent. I didn't care about the midges now, I flung open
my tent and let out a torrent of abuse that even dettered the midges.
needless to say, not a peep was heard for the rest of the night.

I finally got up around 7 and slowly began packing away my gear before
popping over to the shops and grabbing my supplies for the day.

yesterday I'd passed a group of walkers at Rob Roy'a cave and this
morning I saw they'd made it to the same camp site. in passing, one
of the women asked me if I wanted to join them for the day so I jumped
at the chance of sharing the journey with others. on a selfish note,
it meant I didn't have to bother navigating and could follow the crowd.

however soon after we left "basecamp", I realised walking at their
pace wasn't as simple as I thought. it's odd how just the act of
breaking your stride to wait for others can seriously drain you in no
time at all.

I'm glad I gave group walking a whirl as the people were nice, but I
guess the change from 53 days solo walking was just too much.

soon enough I was met by a smiley man who shook my hand before
explaining that he also was an end to end walker! he was the first
one I'd met during this trek, minus the guy at lands end on the 30th
April. it was great to swap stories as we walked together for a mile
or so. eventually our group's badly times pitstop meant we went
seperate ways.

after a few incidents of walking group politics, the gang arrived at
their destination. necking a bottle of OJ and even more water, I was
back on the way... solo!

as I'd been talking for most of the day, my mind had been taken off
how rediculously hot it actually was. back on my own, I didn't know
how I'd even got this far in this heat!

soon enough I arrived at my campsite, but could only sigh as the
moment my pack hit the floor, the midges came out to play... time for
my new citronella candle!

Wed 24th June - Tyndrum to Kinlochleven...

today was the day that put my nerve and legs to the test, so I'm over
the moon that I came out on top... literally!

I woke up at 4am in order to pack away all my gear and get going
before the sun gave me its worst. luckily this mentally early start
paid off and I enjoyed the sight of the sunrise over Beinn Dorain and
Beinn An Dothaidh, making sure to snap away with the camera.

the walk itself wasn't too demanding, but sent me in all the right
directions in order to get the best views over the Grampians. because
of this, I didn't care if I was exhausted - my only complaint was that
my camera couldn't capture what my eyes were seeing.

I soon bumped into a hot german lass who took my mind off my aching
feet for a few miles, even if I had to try hard to understand what she
was saying.

by early afternoon I had arrived at King's House Hotel which was the
route's suggested destination for the day. I wasn't going to pay
hotel prices, so there was only one other option... walk tomorrow's
route to Kinlochleven. this however, meant tackling "the devil's
staircase".

I'd only really heard of the name once, but had no idea as to how
accurate the name was.

before leaving, I wolfed down a ham & cheese toasty and as much OJ as
I could stomach. stupidly however, I did NOT remember to top up my
water and left with barely a liter.

at the base of the devils staircase, I couldn't really make out the
path so headed on up the slope until it became more than apparent.
within no time I was shattered as my boots and walking poles scrambled
to get some grip on the rocky path.

I had to stop a number of times as this was without a doubt the
toughest terrain to date, but once I reached the top it was 100% worth
the effort.

for about 20mins I sat there without making a sound, enjoying the
clarity until another walker appeared at the summit. we both sat on
the edge exhausted, but in silent appreciation of the surroundings.

unfortunately my memory served me very badly indeed and I assumed that
the town was a short descent, how wrong I was. I necked most of my
remaining water and headed on down.

by the time I realised I'd made a mistake about how far it was, I was
totally dehydrated. a killer headache had set in, so I slowed my
descent to save as much energy as possible.

2 hours later I was nearing the town just as the worst of the
dehydration kicked in. until now my body had obviously been swearing,
but now even that had stopped... just goes to show how hot and tough
today was I guess.

once in town, I walked into the nearest pub and lined up 4 pints of
ice cold water; downing them all before being pressured into actually
buying something. I then sat outside and had a chat with some other
walkers and there group leader who kindly sponsored me.

setting up the tent was very slow indeed as I was feeling totally
groggy and still had a pounding headache. my own fault, but thank god
it didn't get worse I suppose.

still, not bad sleeping under the shadow of glen coe!

Thurs 25th June - Kinlochleven to Fort William...

well I'm sorry to moan, but last nights "sleep" was bloody awful! I'm
definitely going to have to invest in a blow up bed once I reach fort
willy as I cannot carry on like this.

after waiting around for the local post office to open, I posted a
load of maps home and stocked up on food for todays journey.

four guys who were doing the west highland way the other way then
decided to pick my brains about how to set up an end to end walk. it
was nice to be regarded as a source of reliable info, so i let them
know the highs and lows before getting back on route.

I was expecting today to be a simple yomp, but how wrong I was. the
ascent at the start was like the devils staircase part deux, apart
from this version was four times longer. the climb was worth the
sweat as I was rewarded with fantastic views over the whole of
kinlochleven from the summit.

once over the top, the majority of the route was fairly simple. the
path rolled along the sides of the glen as I began to catch up with
walkers who'd set off before me.

I was sitting on the brow of a hill having lunch when a group of
scantily clad Uni girls came charging towards me singing 10 green
bottles. try as I might, I couldn't keep up...

the route was supposed to pass through dense forest which would have
made a nice change from the intense sun. however it was pretty
depressing to see the entire forest being cut down around me.

after a few hours, I passed the Uni girls and had a quick chat about
what I was doing. luckily for me, the drool coming from my mouth was
easily disguised as sweat and after taking a group pic, I headed into
fort william to track down a b&b.

aaaah to sleep indoors again...

Fri 26th June - Rest Day In Fort William...

the idea was to have a real lie in today, but by 7am I was up and
about getting my laundry done and attempting to get some order in the
chaos of my bag. it was absolutely glorious outside, so to get a few
more tasks done and to escape jacko-mania, I headed into town.

the train used in one of the harry plopper films was chugging past as
I sat down to some lunch and the job of writing my postcards.

I considered picking up a self-inflating matress but couldn't justify
spending £70, so for now I'll just enjoy the bed in the b&b.

I join the great glen way tomorrow, so Inverness here I come!!!

Mon 8th to Sun 14th June - Crooklands to Hawick...

Mon 8th - Crooklands to Windermere...

Waking to glorious weather was a wonderful start to the day, but the
thought of some new scenery was what made this day fly by.

before I left the campsite at crooklands, I had breakfast with the old
couple in the caravan next door. it was lucky as I'd totally run out
of supplies. in no time at all after leaving, my legs were reminded as
to what a hill felt like!

on the horizon I could see the mountains of the lake district getting
closer and closer, but unusually the thought of an uphill struggle
made me smile. in preperation for a few hills, I stopped at a
roadside shop and was lucky enough to find the owner had a son in the
army - free lunch!

once I arrived in Windermere I spent 2 hours walking between all the
campsites on my maps, to find all were static home sites and or hard
standings. I'd had enough so made a bee-line for the first b&b I
could see.

upon opening the door I was greeted by 2 middle aged men who were
clearly more than business partners. as I ducked under the door they
both erupted in camp laughter and exclaimed "oooh you're a tall one
aren't you!". I could only laugh to myself as for a moment I thought
I was back in Brighton...

Tues 9th June - Windermere to Penrith (2 miles south)...

for the first time in a while I managed to sleep like a log before
heading down to breakfast. even as I ate the full English I could
taste that it wasn't 100% and was realised when it made me wanna hurl
for the remainder of the morning. seeming as I'd be hiking over a
1,500 ft mountain today, feeling ill was the last thing I needed.

as I left Windermere I strafed the lake and brushed the dust from my
camera, giving it the workout it desperately needed. the scenery was
absolutely breathtaking and made a fantastic change from the canal
routes - not that I hadn't enjoyed those.

I probably would have reached the summit in a reasonably quick time,
but I couldn't help but stop and take snaps every 20m.

within a few hours I'd reached the summit and was out of fuel.
luckily there was a tiny pub at the Kirkland pass and seeming as the
dodgy brekkie was a thing of the past, I stopped for some warm soup to
keep me toastie.

the great thing about reaching the summit, apart from the views, was
that I had about 6 miles of downhill walking until I reached the flat
lakes. what I thought would be an easy descent turned out to be a
killer on the knees as with each step, my weighty pack increased the
impact.

the scenery easily took my mind off the aches as I eventually joined
the first of today's lakes, making sure to avoid the main roads. this
allowed me to follow the paths along the shore where I was soon
clambering over rocks and voulting fallen trees... quite the Bear
Grylls... without the scripted scenes and carefully prepared dramas.
I sacrificed speed for fun, and I'm seriously glad I did!!

this was turning out to be the best days walking so far; whether it
was just the change of scenery I'm not sure, but whatever the case I
was loving it.

about 6 miles away from my destination, 2 guys on bicycles passed me
and gave a chirpy hello. in a few minutes I saw them waiting for me
outside a roadside pub so stopped to have a chat. they were also
doing LEJOG but were taking it easy as one of them had done it in the
past and wasn't up for a killer journey.

they were brothers and we shared the horrors of the challenge over a
pint... or lemonade in my case. it made me laugh when one of the guys
said he thought walking LEJOG was mad and wouldn't follow me into
battle as I was clearly bonkers haha!

I finally arrived at the campsite I'd marked on my maps but no one was
around. after ringing the bell a scary looking gent looked angry to
see me. once he knew was I was doing he soon became very smiley and
was kind enough to let me stay for free.
I then headed off to the pub I'd passed on my way into town and
devoured a chicken before wriggling into my sleeping bag.

Carlisle tomorrow with an even earlier start on no breakfast - yum!
this dreary thought was soon vapourised as I got a text from Ian to
let me know he'd managed to get my donations page on his company
intranet. that's an audience of between 400 - 600 people... superstar!

Wed 10th June - Penrith to Carlisle...

After such an amazing walk over the mountains, it was sod's law that
today was going to be a royal stinker. unfortunately I didn't realise
that my predictions would come true so soon.

I had woken up earlier than normal and got all my kit squared away in
record time. unfortunately this counted for zip as I needed to wait
for the local shop to open in order to grab some supplies. once
fuelled up, I hit the roads and made sure to keep clear of the maniacs
in the morning rush.

as I was using the winding hilly lanes, my mind was taken off the
bordome of walking into bland scenery by the burning in my thighs. it
didn't help when I looked back at the scenery I was leaving behind -
but I guess I have all of Scotland to go yet.

the winding hills soon turned into dull rural main roads as I tried to
avoid the same fate as the roadkill I saw every other step. it's hard
to be enthusiastic about walking when your mind and body are sick of A-
Roads, but at least I know why I'm bored - something easily fixed with
Kendal Mint Cake!

in a blind moment of arogance, thinking that a whole bar wouldn't do
much, I wolfed it all down in mere seconds. within no time I was
practically jogging the route and couldn't have stopped if I wanted to
- I was loving the sugar rush.

I've never seen trainspotting, but I guess the come down off heroin is
a piece of cake compared to kendal mint cake. it hit me about 6 miles
outside my destination, and boy did I feel as low as humanly possible!

in a strop I was moping along, barely reading my maps or taking the
time to check where I was heading. this resulted in me getting
totally lost down a farm lane and cornered by a set of teeth that
could have ripped me to shreds. luckily for me the farmers wife
pointed me in the right direction, safely away from the lion they
called a farm dog.

the tears soon dried as the campsite owner let me stay for free,
adding to the fact that she cooked me gammon, chips, egg and beans
with a few beers for only a fiver!

the campsite had a clubhouse where I met john, a total mentalist who
was living at the site whilst he worked on building Carlisle's flood
defence system. Over a few tins we watched the England vs Andorra
game, until my conscience got the better of me and I retired to my
tent and into the land of nod.

Thurs 11th June - Carlisle to Longtown...

even though it was forecast to tip it down overnight, I'd avoided a
soaking and woke to a glorious day - even if I could see trouble
brewing in the distance.

john had kindly handed me a few rations the night before, but in a
moment of weakness I forgot the concept of rationing and devoured an
entire box of Jaffa cakes.

as I laid my maps out in the morning sun, I saw that someone had
pitched their tent next to mine. a guy soon emerged and introduced
himself as another john. in no time, he kindly made me a coffee and
even a giant bowl of porridge - appropriate now I'm nearing Scotland I
guess. however there was something about john that I couldn't put my
finger on; he seemed too happy about life to be human.

he and his wife were cycling the 'Coast To Coast' route on a tandem,
something which filled me with a horrible feeling as it follows a
section of the dreaded Pennine Way - SPITS...

as we chatted over brekkie I realised what john was about as he
released an epic "Jesus Christ our saviour. instantly I felt
seriously embarrased as minutes before I'd been heatedly explaining
the lows of my route with plenty of colourful language... if he was
offended, he hid it well.

as I left he handed me a pamphlet about being a sinner and converting
to Christ. I read it from cover to cover in order to pass the time it
took me to walk into central Carlisle, however I have one major
issue. john was a nice guy but the pamphlet was a bridge too far for
me. I'm still a sinner even doing this charity walk off my own back?
hmm that's some lovely god right there... so in order to re-balance
the religious scales, I listened to the ricky gervais podcast in its
entirity.

once I was in Carlisle and was pamphlet free, I found the two missing
maps I needed and headed for the tourist info centre. the lady behind
the desk was a star and devoted nearly an hour to helping me hunt down
campsites along my route.

luckily for me I also found an outward bound shop within a few paces
and picked up my 3rd and hopefully final map case. for £6 it had all
the bells and whistles - fingers crossed it'll last longer than the
last 2.

on my way out of town I took a few minutes to be a tourist and take a
look around Carlisle castle. it was an amazing monument to British
military history as although empty, the moat and vast towers are all
still totally intact. I snapped a few pictures on my phone before the
guilt of not hitting the roads kicked in.

the rest of the day was spent trudging along the grass verges of the
A7, trying to second guess the weather. one minute it hailed, the
next it was searing heat followed by heavy rain for contrast.

after a further 12 miles I'd had enough and arrived at longtown before
heading to the campsite right on the Scottish border. the lovely
owner let me stay for free which was great, even if I was the only
person on the site. it was in fact located slap bang between two MOD
bases, so at least I was secure even if all my calls were being
monitored.

Fri 12th June - Longtown to Langholm...

I really didn't feel like getting up when my 6am alarm went off, but
by half past the guilt got me out of "bed" and down came the tent. it
was yet another glorious day and would be made even more significant
as today I was passing from England into Scotland.

the plan was to follow the A7 north out of Longtown until I hit
Canonbie, where I would be able to refuel. if this route were to
follow quiet country lanes i'd have been in my element, alas 99% was
on an unfinished main road with no footpaths.

there was a thin strip of the road for cycles, but at the speed some
of the lorries were travelling, I stuck firmly to high up on the
embankment.

Canonbie turned out to be a picturesque little village, far from MPs
expenses and the hectic city life. every single person I passed
greeted me with a smile as I made my way to the local post office for
supplies.

I was feeling that after a week of solid walking, I needed a
psychological boost to stop the negative vibes eating away at me.
this came in the form of posting home a weighty chunk of maps I no
longer needed and how sweet it felt! I then continued to buy out the
shop of its freshly made ham rolls and sat next to the village's new
war memorial munching away.

the rolls tasted identical to the ones my nan makes, which sounds odd,
but there was something about them that drifted me off into a daydream
about home and family. a few passers by snapped me out of my daze by
kindly sponsoring me before they headed into the shop. I quickly left
before they realised it was I who scoffed all all their ham rolls.

the route out of the village was pretty bland, but for a few car park
pitstops with a scattering of sunbleached tourist info boards. they
describe the A7 as the new borders tourist route - what they actually
mean is simply "this is the road to Edinburgh, keep going".

soon I arrived at the southern entrance to Langholm, where I was
greeted by a stunning river running under the bridge that takes you
into town. I tracked down the campsite that the tourist info office
back in Carlisle had found for me and pitched up for free - again!

it was only 2pm by the time I was all set up, so in an attempt to even
up my tan I fell asleep in the blazing sun - only to be women by the
oddest sight.

a pheasant was strolling right up beside me, trying to figure out if I
was safe and or had food to share. I threw it (or pete as I named
him) a few scraps and it decided I was a safe bet, refusing to leave
me alone whilst it checked out my tent.

it wasn't a hot blonde, but the company of this bird was as good as it
was gonna get. as I drifted off, I could only keep reminding myself
that from now on my Bergen is only getting lighter.

Sat 13th June - Langholm to Hawick...

until now the only run-in with mossies was along some of the towpaths
on my early morning starts. these weren't even an issue as I was
passing them by at a good speed. however last night I wasn't so lucky.

after about 2 hours sleep I was woken by the itchy feeling of
something around my neck and ears. I heard the sound of tiny wings in
my ear so swatted it away and thought no more of it. within 5 minutes
I couldn't take any more so reached over for my maglite and shon it
into the tent.

it was like opening the curtain in a dark dindgy room and seeing all
the pieces of dust floating in the air, although this time the dust
wanted to bite me. these buggers were small enough to get through my
tent's inner lining so the only option was to spray myself in deet and
try to get some sleep. it seemed to work as I plugged in my earphones
and attempted to drift off.

in the morning, I opened the tent to see the brothers and sisters of
the gits I'd squashed the night before waiting for another shot at
me. in a shuttle run fashion, I cleared away my tent as soon as I
could and hit the road.

my breakfast had only consisted of a dairy milk chocolate bar which
wasn't going to fuel me for very long at all. the problem was that
there was sod all around as the A7 runs through completely rural
countryside.

after 12 miles of walking on just cold water, I finally found a hotel
that was partially open. I explained what I was up to and wormed a
couple of J2O's and some crisps out of them to fuel my feet.

the route had been pretty dull up til now, but that soon changed as
the A7 joined the River Teviot and turned to head for Hawick.

it was about 6 miles outside Hawick that I made my first idiotic
mistake of this trip which could have resulted a hell of a lot worse
than it did.

I was in a daydream as I walked along the road until I heard a voice
call out hello. it was a friendly looking guy who'd seen my flag and
was having a ciggy outside the front door of a small cottage thagstood
alone, no neighbours for a mile either side. a second guy then came
out to say hello before offering me a coffee. I instantly said yes
without a moments thought and assumed I'd drink it in the doorway as
we chatted.

instead they invited me in and being polite I took a step inside the
cottage, only to instantly regret it. if you've seen/read "Withnail &
I", you'll have an idea of what these two guys were like. the front
room simply had a chair in the middle of the room with a load of
rubbish piled into the fireplace.

as the coffee appeared from the room I assumed was the kitchen, I took
one look at the dirty, crusty looking mug and knew I couldn't drink
even a sip.

just when I thought things couldn't get worse the welsh one of the
pair brought up the issue of money.

"so how have you been paying for stuff along the way then? you must
have some cash on you right?"

FUUUUCKK!! this was going south fast!

"no, I've just been relying on the kindness of strangers, just like
you two offering me coffee" I said, trying to hide the wobble in my
voice as I jiggled the mug of coffee. I kept one eye on my bag,
specifically the zip of the pouch where I'd only recently put back my
penknife after opening the bottle of J2O.

just as I was wracking my brains for a decent excuse to get out, one
of them explained his bus would be along soon and that was all I needed.

"ahh ok, well I best be making tracks before I seize up... cheers for
the coffee" I quickly said as I backed out the front door with a
nervous smile. they looked a bit confused but I was in no position to
give two hoots, I needed to be out of there.

I almost sprinted the next mile before sitting by the side of the road
and yelling "you f*****g idiot" to myself in response to such a school
boy error. I have to laugh it off now, but it certainly didn't feel
too funny at the time.

within a few minutes I came across a roadside diner and stopped fir a
pint if coke and a couple of toasted sandwiches. the guy who ran it
was ex-forces, supporting 45 Commando during his time in the Army
before being medically discharged. he clearly didn't like life on the
outside and by the look in his eyes was not adjusting well, but I
guess you win some you lose some.

once recharged, I pushed on into Hawick and tracked down the tourist
info office. as I came through the door the person that I think was a
woman looked at me like I was sub-human. I explained I was doing a
charity walk and did she know of any nice b&b owners who would be
willing to help me out. her response was amazing...

"well without being rude, anyone could say they're doing a charity
walk to get a discount, but I'll see what I can do."

two things struck me about her reply; A: she was a nob
and B: anyone willing to fly a massive Help For Heroes flag, wear 2
wristbands and an H4H t-shirt and fibally go to the effort of filling
out 3 forms of fake names and addresses all in different handwriting
styles, bloody well deserves a few quid off for the effort!!!!

just for fun, I let her waste 10mins writing out the names and numbers
of b&b's whilst I watched the good looking women working in the coffee
bar behind her. I then stuffed her advice deep into my pocket and
gave her a huge cheshire cat grin as I strolled out and went for a
wonder round town.

I soon found a b&b which had no room but the lovely owner phoned a few
other places and luckily found one right up the hill. when I arrived
and explained what I was doing the owner, Lorraine was over the moon
as her nephew was in the RAF. she said she'd hardly charge me a
thing, so I celebrated with a cavery at the local before crashing out
in front of the tele.

Sun 14th June - Rest day in Hawick...

I seriously needed today to rest up hopefully stop everything aching
so much.

I spent the entire morning watching rubbish on the tele, but by 2pm I
was starving so I headed into town so see what was around.

just after the northern bridge I found a fancy looking Indian
restaurant and I literally couldn't resist. I opted for a pasanda
with all the trimmings just before a couple came in and sparked up a
convo. the husband was a security officer at a local military
barracks and once he knew what I was doing, asked for my donations
site and said he'd spread it round the barracks - result!

after the success of the delicious meal, I headed back to the b&b and
collapsed on the bed barely able to move from all the curry... I love
rest days

Tues 2nd to Sun 7th June - Warrington to Crooklands...

I left the B&B by 6:30 as I really wasn't looking forward to the
thought of the mental patients who ran the place cooking me anything
more complex than toast. as I opened the front door, it made me laugh
to see the notice of how much they charge for breakfast... so really
I'd only paid for a B, not a B&B...

my destination for the day was Burscough Station, from where I'd catch
the train directly west to Southport and take a rest day with Ian &
Lynn. don't worry readers, I'm not cheating... I'll catch the train
back to the exact spot when I return from Southport.

it was a seriously hot day which made each step feel like I was wading
through tar. the sun roasted the back of my neck as within only a few
hours, I'd gone through all my water already.

I could only laugh as the broken down engine of an articulated lorry
exploded thick grey smoke over the entire road. it happened to be the
exact moment I was crossing a dual carriageway, so I and any cars
nearby had no idea which way was up. frozen to the spot I didn't dare
walk anywhere on the off chance some idiot driver thought he/she could
drive through it.

luckily as it cleared, I could see all the drivers around were as
frozen to the spot as me. with a cough and a splitter, everyone
carried on with their journies and so did I.

walking along A-Roads has the downside of becoming boring as hell, but
it has the upside of being laden with tuneful honks from drivers as
they notice my flag flapping in the wind. as I passed a truck stop, a
sudden and bone rattling honk from a giant truck made me leap out of
my boots. to my luck he was simply offering me a coffee, so I kindly
accepted and carried along the footpath with a plastic cup of
something similar to coffee.

I finally got to Burscough station and just before I entered the
gates, I got a cheer and a thumbs up from some lads in a works van. I
felt like I needed to explain I wasn't cheating as I wondered into the
station, but soon laughed it off as my train arrived and headed off to
Southport.

Wed 3rd June - Rest day with Ian & Lynn in Southport...

it was great to have a lie in without the worry of it costing me B&B
rates for once! unfortunately Lynn had to head off to work, so Ian &
I chilled out and chatted over a bacon sarnie and a few coffees whilst
the dogs checked out my bag and more importantly stinky boots.

after lunch, we jumped in the car and headed out to Southport seafront
where ian gave me the guided tour. it was a beautiful place to live,
with some fantastic Victorian buildings lining the center of town. it
reminded me of a cleaner and bigger Old Steine back in Brighton, which
was a really nice taste of home.

it was great to be walking around and enjoying the sites without the
burden of the bag weighing me down. especially on yet another glorious
day!

a few hours later, we hopped back in the car and headed back to
Birkdale and to three lively dogs who were ready for their dinner...
and so was I.
on the way we passed the Royal Birkdale golf course where I saw up
close, the cylinder shaped building that coca-cola offer a blank
cheque to in order to paint it as a coke can each time the open is
on. seeming as the price includes putting it back to how it was, I
think it's mad they've never agreed.

after a spag bol to rival all others and a few beers to wash it down,
I was ready to crash out. I'd had a fantastic day and knew I'd keep
in contact with Ian & Lynn... especially as I'll possibly be heading
back this way too.

Thurs 4th June - Southport to Preston...

today was a calm day to ease the legs back into the pace of things.
the weather had taken pity on me and decided to cool right down, which
made walking a hell of a lot more bearable. so after a sad goodbye to
Ian & Lynn I was back at Burscough station and on my way to Preston.

the journey itself was very indescript apart from a few lovely people
who stopped their cars to donate and or cheer me on with big grind all
round.

once I'd reached Preston, it took nearly 1.5 hours to find a B&B that
didn't cost the earth. one wanted £110 for one night, but luckily I
found one for £20 close by.

after unpacking I headed out to grab a quick dinner and seeing the
army recruiting office still open, I popped my head round the door and
gave them a thumbs up much to their delight.

I wasn't a massive fan of what I'd seen in Preston, so grabbing my
dinner I didn't hang around long before crashing out back at the B&B.

Fri 5th June - Preston to Garstang...

once I'd fuelled myself up with a full English, I was glad to be
heading out into the familiarity of quieter roads and less smog.

in no time I was racking up the donations as people were stopping me
in the street to see what I was doing. it was great to see more
support as I headed further out of Preston, but the oddest thought
popped into my head... I'd only had donations and support from british
white people?! as I walked along the pavements, I was in my own world
wondering as to why this was.

I guessed that it showed how few troops their are in the forces who
are from other ethnic groups, which is mad really!! there is a huge
cultural mix in Preston and I'd have been over the moon if anyone who
wasn't white had come up to me and even had a chat about what I was
doing.

I suppose I could just keep doing what I'm doing and hope for the
best... whilst ripping down every BNP poster and sign I see on my way
that is.

my mind was taken off the political minefield of race relations by a
car pulling up next to me and thed river introducing himself as Kev.
he was from "Skills Force" which to my delight, since I'd left for
Lands End, had become Help For Heroes' sister charity. they helped
troops get into work placements once H4H had medically got them back
in gear, yet another fantastic cause me thinks!!!

as I rolled into Garstang, a couple of guys instantly handed me a few
notes and we had a chat about the town and its history. apparently it
was Europe's first fair trade village - there's your fact for the day
readers... it's up to you to find out if it's twaddle.

although these B&Bs are adding up, I REALLY needed it now and my body
is telling me to slow down. once my left ankle had healed, now my
right knee is agony... go figure. I knew I'd be meeting Dad in
Lancaster tomorrow so strapping my knee up, my head more than happily
hit the pillow.

Sat 6th June - Garstang to Lancaster...

making the most of the comfy pub's restaurant area, I devoured a full
English and waited for the rain to pass.

as I left the pub, I realised it was D-Day as an old man smiled at me
and said "land of hope and glory". I crossed the road to join him and
asked him for directions even though I knew exactly where I was
going. the fact he thought he'd helped me out put a huge grin on his
face as he wished me luck and hobbled away.

the rain had by now headed by my way, so on went the waterproofs and
in-turn, so did my blinkers.

as I rounded the corner to the lancaster aquaduct where the hotel was,
2 TA soldiers came jogging along the towpath. with a big thumbs up,
they wished me luck and carried on with their training adding that
they thought I was mad and should have cycled it.

as I waited for dad to arrive by train, I watched the D-Day parades
and it put my moans, aches and pains into a laughable perspective. I
thought not finding a B&B was a hard life... how pathetic in comparison.

on a lighter note it was great to see dad again, even if he did bring
the remainder of the maps which would make my bag VERY heavy indeed.

after going for dinner and having a few beers, we planned the route to
john o'groats before crashing out ready for tomorrow.

Sun 7th June - Lancaster to Crooklands...

making the most of the hotels all you can eat breakfast, I loaded up
on everything n anything I could eat before waving bye to dad and
getting back on the road.

heading out of Lancaster, I kept switching between canal routes and A
roads to try and prevent boredom setting in... it didn't work.

I was about to cross the road to a big tescos to grab some lunch when
a car screeched up infront of me with its music blaring. the 4 lads
inside looked like they were gonna mug me, so with the look of a bunny
in the headlights I waited for them to move.

luckily I was totally wrong as they asked me how far I was walking and
were totally shocked when I told them. handing me all the change from
their pockets, they were gone in a whirlwind of drum'n'bass and
tuneful horn honks.

breaking away from dull A roads, I wondered into the sleepy village of
Holme as I'd seen a pub on my maps - hoping for a Sunday lunch. alas
I'd missed it by 10mins so I had to put up with the local shop to
refuel my feet.

this must have been a blessing in disguise as I spent the following
half an hour chatting up the gorgeous woman who ran the store. my
charms worked as she gave me lunch for £1, so once I'd finished it, I
used the excuse of returning for a chocolate bar to chat some more.
ahhh good times :)

within 10mins of leaving the gorgeous brunette, I got stopped by 2
cyclists who were also doing the end to end challenge. they (and I in
turn) laughed as they admitted how all their accommodation was pre-
booked and had a support team waiting for them ahead. I would have
loved that, but it was nice enough to hear then admit "you're making
us look like a pair of girls here"...

I finally found a place to pitch my tent in a tiny place called
Crooklands which on my maps boasted 3 campsites all right next to each
other. just my luck two were retirement sites but the 3rd was run by
a deaf old man who let me stay for free - made even sweeter by the
woman who brought me a bowl of hot soup for my tea as I crawled into
my tent... yum!

Mon 1st June - Newchurch Common to Warrington...

I woke to yet again another gloriously clear morning, with not a cloud in the sky.  Hobbling over to Ian & Lynn's caravan, I could smell the BBQ already in full effect and licked my lips once I saw there was a fresh full English on the way.

With the state of my ankle I knew that I wasn't going to be rushing off today, so took it easy and made the most of Ian and Lynn's company whilst their dogs attempted to circle the table like sharks, picking off any morsels that were unlucky enough to leave the safety of the work surface.

My tent wasn't going to pack itself - no matter how hard I wished it did - so I began to pack away all my gear with one major pain in the bum.  Even before I was walking, I was sweating like a pig... it was even hotter than yesterday and it was only around 10am!

Once I was packed and showered, I returned to Ian & Lynn to thank them for their lifesaving kindness.  They let me know that if I wanted, I could crash at their house and rest up my leg seeming as my route passed where they lived anyway.  Without a second thought, I agreed and hobbled out the entrance to the campsite with a bit more of a sense of direction.

In no time at all, I was melting into the pavement however my spirits were kept high by the tuneful honks from cars.  It didn't stop at honks, with one old couple turning their car around to have a chat with me and let me know their grandson was just returning from Afghanistan as a Royal Marine.  His mother had died when the grandson was a toddler and the grandparents had looked after him since.  They were immensely proud, which showed as both of them had tears in their eyes when talking about him. 

Once I reached Warrington, I passed the insanely rich side of town and wondered into the less desirable area where I'd managed to track down a B&B.  Just as I was starting to think I was gonna get murdered, a lorry driver pulled up beside me and managed to block an entire road in order to lean across and hand me a fiver.

"Good lad, get yourself a pint" he shouted from the cab before pulling off to the delight of all the drivers behind him.

I finally arrived at the door to the B&B and rang the doorbell... and again... and again.  For about 5-10mins I was ringing and alas, no answer.  I called the B&B to say I was outside, but the doorbell wasn't working and a frantic sounding woman said she was on her way.  In a tornado of bath towels, she opened the door wearing next to nothing, the bath towel covering only the vitals.

I know what you're thinking - Ed's struck gold here - you're wrong... very wrong! It was like a hippo with a glandular problem greeting me.  So feeling along the walls with my eyes closed, I made my way to the bedroom and crashed out. 

Sun 31st May - Market Drayton to Lancaster... more entries to come soon!

I left Market Drayton very early to try and make some progress before the sun made my life a misery.  It didn't last long as even the early morning sun roasted me like a spud.

After 6 hours I'd already gone through more than 2 liters of water and needed more as soon as possible.  I felt myself mentally wondering off and becoming easily bored, a clear sign I was getting dehydrated (either that or I was actually just bored out of my mind).  Necking a gallon of water, I used the time to phone home and check everyone was safe and sound.

As I hauled my bag onto my back and returned to the fun of the roads, I felt my left ankle really tightening up.  I'd twisted it moving out of the way for a lorry, but after taking a quick look, it didn't feel like I'd done anything major to it - even if it didn't feel that way.  I then looked at my maps, picked the closest campsite I could find and popped a few pain killers to ease me back into my stride.

Even though I was in a lot of pain and was trying to get to the campsite at Newchurch Common as soon as possible, I couldn't help but notice the amount of money flying around this area (sometimes quite literally).  I barely saw a single car that wasn't a Ferrari or similar; not to mention the private choppers that were delivering people here and there... rich buggers... Unfortunately for me, I didn't have time to hang around and drool at the beautiful women in their cars, I needed to bed down and let me leg heal.

Taking a second to glance at my watch, I realised I'd been walking for over 12 hours in temperatures that could have cooked an egg or ten.  Because of this, I must have looked a real mess as I passed a guy walking his dogs outside the front of the campsite entrance - however that was my last concern as the campsite wasn't tent friendly YET AGAIN!!!

Seeing the no camping sign, my heart totally sank and in the state I was in there was no way I could have gone any further.  I decided to hunt down the owner and either beg or force him or her to let me stay.  Luckily I didn't have to remotely beg as the owner (Mike) instantly warmed to my cause and pointed me over to a corner of the site they kept for just such an occasion... PHEW!

After peeling my shoes off and setting up my tent, I seriously needed something to eat.  Mike came over and handed me two freshly laid eggs from his hens. so I politely accepted them and sat down in front of my tent with one in each hand.  In a trance, I sat there looking at the eggs before saying to myself "what the hell am I supposed to do with these?" - I had no way of cooking them, except for on my sunburn.

The sound of gravel under feet brought me out of my daze and I looked round to see the man who had been walking his dogs heading my way.  With a very welcoming smile, he introduced himself as Ian.

"Hello, I saw your flag out front and wondered what you were up to..."

I explained what I was up to and he proceeded to actually safe a human life by inviting me over to have a BBQ with him and his wife Lynn.  Obviously I had to refrain to leaping into his arms and kissing him with joy, so with a massive smile I launched my kit into the tent at light speed and joined them for dinner.

They were a fantastic couple and we chatted about our lives, families and such, 'til the sun went down.  Lynn's brother is currently serving in the RAF as a dog handler, so she was especially happy to know I cared about helping our troops.  Ian also had friends who had served with the paras, so smiles all round as the BBQ died down.  There were no words for how much I enjoyed both the company and BBQ, including the couple of beers that accompanied the evening which went down faaaaar too easily for my liking.

Reluctantly I headed back to my tent to get some sleep and chuckled to myself as I found two bottles of beer propping up the entrance to my tent.  I'd instantly bonded with Ian & Lynn and they'd kindly invited me back for brekkie in the morning, so whilst sipping on one of my fresh beers I whipped out todays maps... 29 miles... ouch!

Fri 29th to Sat 30th - Wolverhampton to Market Drayton

Friday 29th...

today started at a really slow pace as I packed up my stuff in the
hotel room, ready to make tracks back onto the canals. I assumed the
room had included brekkie but upon asking at reception, I realised I
was totally wrong. the receptionist clearly saw how deflated I was
and quickly ran to the kitchen to grab some fruit and a packet of
Alpen cereal. the thought was amazingly kind of her, but all I needed
to do now was find a bowl and some milk... where's a cow when you need
one?

after 2 hours of casual plodding along, I sat down beside a lock and
had my breakfast of a bruised and battered apple. luckily I found a
twix hiding in my bag and as I began opening it, I saw a baby duck
waddle up next to me. 5 more joined it before they sat in the water
in front of me waiting expectantly. they were too cute to ignore so
giving in, I broke the twix into 6 pieces and made sure each duckling
got a piece.

quick as a flash, the twix was devoured and the ducklings sat there
waiting for more. before I could say "sorry, no more left", a
whirlwind of feathers landed around me as mother duck burst in on the
scene, quacking like a mentalist! at this point I realised even duck
mums don't want their kids eating junk food, so making my excuses I
made tracks.

p.s. I haven't lost my mind... yet!!!

back on the towpaths, I was plodding along at a reasonable pace even
though the sun was at hot as lava on the back of my neck. at each
bridge I begged the footpath to switch sides into the shade, but as
per usual my prayers went unanswered.

by late afternoon I felt like I'd had more than enough, especially as
I still had about 10 miles to my destination of Market Drayton. just
as my legs were feeling like jelly, a canal boat caught up with me
(says a lot about how slow I was walking) and made the perfect pace
'car'. for the nextfew hours I played cat and mouse with the boat,
steaming ahead before resting in the time it took for him to catch up.

just before Goldstone I'd had more than enough and gave my dad a call
to see if he could find and book a B&B in Market Drayton, which would
give me the reason to walk that I needed urgently. like a star, he
did and I was on my way, although someone needed to remind my legs
that they now had a deadline.

after 28 miles I was drenched in sweat and could have easily dived
into the canal to cool down. just as this urge was getting too strong
to resist, I saw a campsite out of the corner of my eye, although I
thought it was a mirage at first.

as I collapsed through the gate, the owner may have saved my life by
handing me a free bottle of coke and a bud to put a smile back on my
face. the owner, alex then kindly let me stay for free so repaying
his kindness I ordered a T-Bone steak and wolfed it down with a cider.

these canals are gonna be the death of me...

Sat 30th...

after waking up at 6am to the beautiful sound of something like a
grouse squaking at my tent, I packed up my tent and wrote a thank you
letter to Alex for letting me stay for free.

the woodchip beds for pitching up tents was a fantastic idea, but the
reality wasn't so sweet. I woke up more than twice to the fun of my
tent collapsing on top of me due to the lack of grip the tent pegs
had. the fact that the pitch was free made up for my pityful nights
sleep though.

I instantly felt the heat as I rejoined the Shropshire Union Canal and
knew walking today was gonna be a killer. I ambles along the canal on
a breakfast of one kiwi fruit... hmm filling!

2 hours later I arrived in Market Drayton and headed into town to hunt
down a cafe for some brekkie. after walking down a freshly cooked
full English for only £7, I knew I wasn't going to be walking anywhere.

seeming as it had everything I'd need to stock up and I'd done a bit
of walking to get here, my conscience was clear about resting up for
the remainder of the day.

heading out for a wonder around Market Drayton, the beautiful country
town you meet at the canal is ripped into a million grotty pieces by
the young pikey mums and chavvy kids on bikes. it's funny how scum
seems to ruin even the furthest reaches of this country... and I know
that's quite a statement but I couldn't care less!

back to the sanctuary of the B&B it is for me...

Bath to Wolverhampton

Fri 22nd May - Bath and beyond...

Unfortunately this trek isn't going to walk itself, so we made an
early start and left Julie, Cerith & Nan, bound for the spot I'd been
picked up from in Bath 2 days prior.
As I waved my pop goodbye and made tracks along the canal, I realised
today was the first time for god knows how long that I was wearing my
cap and sunnies instead of my hat and body warmer. however without
jinxing the weather, I would have preferred to walk in the cold!

Making a later start obviously means you're gonna be walking much
later into the day, although somehow i'd managed to arrive in Bristol
by 4pm. as I rounded the corner to the campsite we'd spotted on my
maps, the worry that a campsite in Bristol city centre was too good to
be true was realised. I'd already walked 18 miles to Bristol so to
find another site meant a further 10 mile yomp. to save cash, I took
a very deep breath and got back into my stride.

I think the people of Bristol got together to help boost my spirits
just as I was feeling shattered, as a soldier in full camo who gave me
the thumbs up from his car was quickly followed by a guy on a
motorbike peeped twice before serving across the lanes to present
another thumbs up. it sounds like nothing, but to me it meant the
world.

reaching the mouth of the river Severn was great on such a nice day as
I could see the welsh coast as clear as... well daylight. it felt odd
being so close and not crossing over like I'd done so many times
before, but at least I had a great view!

finally I arrived at the campsite and was seriously ready to
collapse. it was 8pm and I'd not solidly walked for this long in my
life. my heart sank as I realised this site was for static homes, but
there was no way I could go any further. I sat next to my bag
checking my maps for any local sites, but nothing at all.

by this time I had attracted the attention of am old couple who stood
in their adjacent mini gardens gesturing more than a deaf couple.
as I approached them, I readied my most wellspoken voice and smiled
whilst the old woman glared at me like I'd just murdered her entire
family.

"hello my name's Ed. I'm doing a charity walk for help for heroes." as
I continued I could see her fears dispelled and she pointed me over to
the owners house.
explaining for a second time as to what I was doing, I luckily found
the answer I was looking for and bedded down for the night in the
site's playground. I could only thank my lucky stars as my head hit my
pillow... well, semi-deflated pillow anyway.

Sat 23rd May - Severn Bridge to Slimbridge...

Today was a total scorcher! I woke up to completely clear skiescand
the sun making the packing away of my tent as simple as pie. after
spending far too long getting back onto the Severn Way, I tried my
hardest to find my stride, however the bullocks in nearly every field
had other ideas.

as I dropped my pack in a field and slumped down into the grass, I was
greeted by an older couple heading the other way. thank god I did
take this route as Liz & Jim kindly sponsored me £10. with a smile on
my face, on went the pack and into my belly went the last of the welsh
cakes my nan had kindly baked for me.

after a while, I was clear of the fields along the Severn and was
taking a shortcut through the lanes alongside Shapness. taking 5mins
for a bit of a breather, I sat by the roadside checking my maps and
soaking my feet in surgical spirit.
my help for heroes flag was flapping in the breeze as a car pulled up
beside me; the lady passenger smiling and telling me to get some food
with the fiber she handed me. she then reached into her shopping bags
and pulled out an ice cold Feist icecream before shooting off in her
car.

I couldn't help but sit there laughing to myself at how fantastically
surreal the situation was, so wolfed down the Feist and made a beeline
for the canal.

it was great to be back on the flat as I steamed along the towpath,
heading for the campsite at Slimbridge. as I rounded the corner, I
could see it was heaving with families and caravans, so I heading for
reception and introduced myself to Keith who ran the show.
all the miles seemed worthwhile as he let me stay for free if I could
find a spot to tuck myself in.
slotting between an empty tent and a couple who were the spitting
image of ricky tomlinson & his wife from The Royal Family tv show, I
grinned from ear to ear as 'ricky' offered me a beer.

the beer unfortunately wasnt the only thing he shared as he began
burping and farting like his on-screen doppleganger. his wife warned
me he shored but I feared that was his best feature... it was windy
enough already!

trying to get a break from ricky, I took a shower before sitting down
with tomorrows maps... 22 miles... goodnight.

Sun 24th May - Slimbridge to Hawbridge...

today began as glorious as yesterday had done, even with the awful
nights sleep I'd had. the royal family spent most of the night
releasing all manner of gases, only ever apologising when I made it
more than apparent I was awake by loudly calling out "for Christ's
sake!".

at 6am I'd had enough and very loudly packed away my tent, making sure
I coughed, sighed and zipped each zip about 20 times more than was
necessary.

the scenery was fantastic as I marched alongside canal boats, early
morning fishermen and even a tall ship that was moored up with its
sails down. I soon bumped into a woman who started explaining to me
that the 'Severn Bore' was on its way, but seeming as I had no idea
what that was, she explained it was a small tidal wave that shot up
the river Severn every 12 hours. it was exactly what I needed to hear
as it took my mind off my blisters whilst I trudged along the towpaths
before returning to lanes and B roads. even this didn't become dull
as people were sponsoring me left right and centre, including one
woman who nearly ran me over before reversing 20 metres to give me £5
sponsorship... in hindsight it was probably so I didn't call the police.

after an hour or two fighting my way through shoulder high nettles and
insanely brave bullocks, I realised that if I was following mark
moxon's route I'd be sitting down to a sunday carvery and gulping down
some ale. as I passed literally hundreds of people doing just that
next to a canal, I couldn't help but want to growl at each and every
one... so I did, but only on the inside.

the last thing I'd eaten was an apple at 12pm and I could feel my body
battling the urge to drop into a heap and fall asleep. it's funny how
quickly I've become tuned in to what my body needs, but I don't have
to keep reminding myself that unlike back home, I can't just walk to
the fridge to grab a snack.

within 3 further hours of walking I turned up at my original
destination, but finding the campsite totally full I walked an extra 2
miles to a site that was recommended by a rambler I bumped into.
unfortunately it turned out to be a caravan site but after some
pleading, I finally got to set up my tent and headed to the pub down
the lane.

luck was yet again against me as none of the pubs did food on a
Sunday. with a dinner of beef crisps, a mars bar and a packet of
peanuts, I hit the cider and made it my mission to relax.

it certainly helped when a couple of guys from the bar opened the
conversation with "you look shattered mate!" and proceeded to buy me
endless beers! in no time at all I was sat down with a large group of
fantastic people all linked to The Hawbridge Inn to some degree.

at this point I realised my dinners over the last couple of days
consisted of cheap and nasty instant meals that were doing me no good
at all. like a mind reader one of the girls offered to make me a ham
and tomato sarnie. without shouting "yipeeeee", I thanked her and off
she went.

a while later, after chatting with the rest of the group about my life
and the walk so far, Launa returned with the mother of all sandwiches;
3 tiers of ham and tomato possibly sculpted by angels themselves. in
seconds it was gone and washed down with a few more beers.

this day had been tough on my spirits but the hornbridge had lifted
them to the Nth degree.

Mon 25th May - Rest day in "The Haw"...

after last nights fun and frolics at the pub, I woke up with a bit of
a hangover so I instantly knew this was the perfect rest day. the
weather was overcast, which was exactly what I wanted as it made a
perfect change from the blistering heat of yesterday. I had a lie in
until about 8.30 when the owner of the land I was pitched in came over
for a chat. as I asked him if it was possible to stay an extra night,
he kindly agreed and invited me over to his house to have breakfast
with him and his wife.

they were such a lovely couple and served up a great brekkie of
cereal, toast and fresh coffee before letting me know they'd even gone
to the effort of making me a load of sandwiches for my lunch! I think
I must have a face which says 'look after me', as I wasn't expecting
the kindness of strangers to last this far into my trek.

we chatted further as mike explained the entire campsite and its
surroundings were not that long ago under about 7 feet of water,
allowing him to sail his small 1 man boat around his entire house!
it's certainly a concern I'd never had living in Brighton.

not long after I'd returned to my tent from mike & lyn's, I was having
a coffee with the family who were staying in their caravan to the
right of me. they were a great bunch and it reinforced the decision
to have taken this day to rest up... plus these sandwiches are
delicious!!

once back in my tent and not being invited over for coffee, I settled
down to my maps to work out how far I'd walked since my rest day. my
pop had bought me a map measurer that you roll over your maps to tally
up the distance, so rolling it over my route I figured out I'd walked
70+ miles in 3 days. seeming as this distance took me about 5 days
when I first started walking, it made me almost laugh to myself. this
feeling of joy was cut short as the mileage reminded my feet of what
they'd gone through.

later I headed over to the hawbridge inn for some comfort food which
turned out to be a whole afternoon of hilarious games in the pub's
garden including; the tug of war and a gladiators style wet pillow
fight above a pool of water. this was easily the best rest day by far
and certainly beat sitting in a B&B watching rubbish tele.

Tues 26th May - Hawbridge to Top Barn Farm...

All I can say is WOW! if all days were like today, I'll finish this
walk in a matter of weeks with a spring in my step and a huge grin.

I left Hawbridge at 7.15 and waved goodbye to Lyn as she headed out to
walk her dog. crossing the footbridge, I was back on the Severn Way
but there was one major issue; the waterproof lining in my boots
seemed to have given up the ghost. within 5mins my feet were totally
sodden, so at the nearest spot I jumped back onto the A38 and was
eating away at the miles - but more importantly drying my boots out.

just as I was falling into the hypnotic rhythm of plodding along, I
heard a noise which made my ears prick up. by now my help for heroes
flag was flying high and proud, attached to my walking poles and
flapping like mad for all to see. as the noise grew louder I realised
what it was... WHOOSH! a harrier roared straight over my head, dipping
its wing at what felt like mere feet above my head. it sent a shiver
down my spine and made all my hairs stand on end, but the fun wasn't
over. a second harrier burst over the hilltop, completely shadowing
the path of the previous one. I looked at my maps to see where they'd
come from but by the time I looked up again, both harriers had vanished.

for a split second I'd wondered if they'd seen the bright, destinctive
colours of the Help For Heroes flag, however travelling at the speed
they were, I very much doubt there was much they could make out. even
so, the 0.01% chance they did see it made me smile from ear to ear and
refuelled my tired feet.

the smiles continued as I got a few tuneful honks from cars alongside
nods from stationary drivers. leaving the main roads behind, I
arrived in Worcester and took some time out from walking to wonder
around its beautiful cathedral. the bells chimed 3pm as I sat by the
river eating a late lunch and enjoyed watching others do the walking
for a change. it was nice to see some beautiful women wonder by -
certainly made a change from sheep and bulls :)

as quickly as I entered Worcest, I was leaving and heading for my
destination, the riverside village of Holt Heath. about a mile from
my destination, I passed a woman who had seen my flag waving from my
bag and let me know about a lovely couple, David & Di, who might let
me stay at their campsite.

I'd already had it marked on my maps so hearing they were lovely
people I headed up the long drive alongside Pippa. I'd soon managed
to secure myself a free spot for the night and was setting up my tent
when Pippa returned with a very smiley man that turned out to be David.

as we talked about the best place to pitch up out of the wind, David
made a great day perfect by offering to let me stay on their farm!
I've come to accept that I have 'help me' stamped on my forehead but
no way am I washing it off. after freshening up, we shared life
stories over coffee before Di let me know I'd be staying for dinner
with them and their friends - result... roast lamb and all the
trimmings!

whilst dinner was cooking away, we walked the dogs around their
plantation and David exaplained what he had going on. it was a
fantastic setup that allowed kids with disabilities to experience
working on a farm and selling their goods in the farm shop. it's hard
to explain the whole works, but google 'Hilltop Farm, Holt Heath' and
you can see for yourself.

he'd had one hell of a life, leaving the UK for Uganda at 21 until it
became too dangerous, but returning as much as possible to what had
become a home from home.

dinner went down a treat as I filled them in on the highs and lows of
this challenge so far, but in no time it was getting late. thanking
David & Di for an amazing evening, I hit the hay.

Wed 27th May - Top Barn Farm to Wolverly...

Seeming as this day had such a fantastic start, I'd hoped the rest of
the day would have followed suit - unfortunately it really didn't.

I woke up at 7 and ambles over to the main farmhouse from my visitors
diggs. awaiting me was Di with a fresh coffee and some cereal that
went down a treat. what I didn't realise was that this was only a
starter and was followed by a torrent of home made produce to stuff me
to the brim.

David and his two sons then joined us for the tail end of brekkie and
it was clear that this was a late start for them; even though I felt
like I was still asleep.

as the farm kicked into life, I made my excuses and left to pack my
gear - taking as long as possible seeming as I could have stayed there
for an eternity. it really brought back memories of my grandfather's
farm in Barry, which as I sat on the end of the bed made the minutes
melt away until I realised 45mins had passed.

david was already busy in meetings with his farmhands, but as I gave
Di a hug goodbye she handed me a load of sarnies and goodies to keep
me going. reluctantly, I closed the main gate behind me and was on my
way.

sticking to the main roads, I made pretty good time but again I had a
major issue; I just couldn't be arsed to walk any further. normally
even though I could be tired, I'd still keep walking for an hour
before having my 5mins of rest. however today I found myself stopping
to read my maps purely because it meant I could drop my bag.

this continued all bloody day and I couldn't shift the feeling of
boredom. maybe it was because I'd stayed in a place I didn't want to
leave? or maybe due to the 30 miles I'd walked yesterday? whatever the
case, I just couldn't be stuffed any more.

as I reached my goal of 17 miles to the Wolverly campsite, I tried to
get a discount on the £7.50 that it cost to pitch up. it was like
getting blood from a stindgy stone, so admitting defeat I set the tent
up and headed to the nearest pub for a steak.

fingers crossed tomorrow perks up otherwise I'm gonna be having
serious words with myself!!!

p.s. I may as well have microwaved my walking boots and priced it up
as serlion steak... I'll forget today ever happened.

Thurs 28th May - Wolverly to Wolverhampton...

Apart from the fantastic donations that I got from the owners of the
canal boats alongside the Staffordshire & Worcester canal, today was
really nothingy. I posted back some of my unused maps which alongside
a meaty breakfast in Kinver was a good psychological boost to fuel
todays walking.

the scenery was lovely along the canal route and even better was the
fact that it was totally flat. I spoke to a guy who was sanding down
his narrowboat who was over the moon to hear about my journey. he had
spent most of his life doing long distance walked but had developed a
lung condition in the nepalese mountains, spelling the end for his
adventurous lifestyle. he kindly gave me the heads up as to where to
avoid in terms of yobby areas and a few good pubs to stop at, but I
still had miles to walk.

I kept eating and eating to prevent boredom from setting in, but this
could only last for so long. at the 21 mile mark, I realised there
was a hotel symbol on my maps right next to the canal. as I rounded
the corner of the lock, I saw it was a Holiday Inn and was expecting
to have to pay in blood for a room. however, explaining what I was
doing and trying to charm the socks off the woman on reception, she
finally agreed to give me a double room with a massive tele and free
wifi for £25... back of the net!!

long day tomorrow, so the huge bed is calling me. night night readers :)